1. Счастье — в браке
Миф: Из-за высокого уровня разводов, которыми заканчиваются несчастливые браки, люди, которые пребывают в браке, являются более счастливыми, чем люди предыдущих поколений, которые были в браке и жили с человеком независимо от того, насколько качественным был брак.
Факт: Согласно данным, полученным в результате проведения нескольких крупных исследований, общий уровень счастья людей, находящихся в браке не увеличился, и, вероятно, несколько снизился. Некоторые исследования показали, что браки, заключенные в 21 веке, по сравнению с теми, которые заключались 20 или 30 лет назад, характеризуются большим присутствием связанным с работой стрессов, большим количеством супружеских конфликтов и меньшим объемом семейных контактов и взаимодействия.
2. Стандартное сожительство
Миф: Сожительство — это тот же брак, только без штампа в паспорте.
Факт: Сожительство, как правило, не приносит тех же выгод (физическое здоровье, эмоциональное и финансовое благополучие), что и брак. С точки зрения этих преимуществ, сожители больше напоминают одиночек, чем женатых пар. Это связано в частности с тем, что сожители не так «совершенны», как семейные пары, они более ориентированы на свою личную автономию и в меньшей степени на благосостояние своего партнера.
3. Сексуальная жизнь
Миф: женатые люди меньше удовлетворены половой жизнью, и реже занимаются сексом, чем одинокие люди.
Факт: По данным многочисленных крупномасштабных исследований, женатые люди намного чаще занимаются сексом, причем они получают от него больше удовлетворения, чем одиночки. Мало того, что они занимаются сексом чаще, они получают от него больше удовольствия, как физического, так и эмоционального.
4. Насилие в семье
Миф: Брак подвергает женщину более высокому риску столкнуться с насилием.
Факт: Многие исследования показывают, что, наоборот, будучи незамужней и живя с мужчиной вне брака, женщина подвергает себя более высокому риску столкнуться с насилием. Одной из причин таких выводов может быть то, что замужние женщины могут скрывать факты наличия насилия в семье. Кроме того, женщины реже вступают в брак и чаще разводятся с тем, кто склонен к насилию. Но также верным является и тот факт, что женатые мужчины менее склонны к совершению насилия в семье, потому что они больше инвестировали в благополучие своих жен, а, следовательно, их семьи. Эти социальные факторы, судя по всему, и помогают агрессивному поведению мужчины не перейти рамки дозволенного.
5. Продолжительность жизни
Миф: Люди сегодня не должны ожидать того, что брак продлится всю жизнь, как это было в прошлом, потому что продолжительность жизни в настоящее время намного выше.
Факт: Если сравнение, о котором говорится в мифе, восходит своими корнями к событиям столетней давности, то не существует никаких причин, чтобы верить в этот миф. Увеличение продолжительности жизни объясняется резким сокращением детской смертности. И в то время, как взрослый человек сегодня живет несколько дольше, чем его бабушки и дедушки, он, при этом, и в брак вступает в более позднем возрасте. Поэтому продолжительность типичного брака, без разводов, не сильно изменилась за последние 50 лет. Кроме того, многие пары разводятся задолго до того, как их браку стукнет солидная круглая дата: половина всех разводов случается на 7 год брака.
6. Совместная жизнь до брака
Миф: Пары, которые живут меньше до брака, в состоянии проверить, насколько хорошо они подходят друг другу, такие браки более долговечны, и партнеры получают больше удовлетворения от них.
Факт: Многие исследования обнаружили, что те, кто живут вместе до брака имеют более низкий уровень удовлетворенности браком, причем шансы на то, что в конечном итоге жизнь такой пары закончится разводом, значительно выше. Одной из причин является то, что сожители сильнее боятся обязательств и что они чаще уходят, когда возникают какие-либо проблемы. В добавлении, сам факт совместного проживания может привести к развитию такого рода отношений, которые «осложнят» возможность счастливого брака. Результаты одного из последних исследований показали, например, что у сожителей меньше мотиваций для разрешения конфликтов и поддержания имеющейся близости. Одно важное исключение: сожительствующие пары, которые планируют в ближайшем времени пожениться, обладают такими же шансами на успех брака, как и те, кто не жил вместе до брака.
7. Образованной женщине труднее выйти замуж
Миф: Чем образованнее женщина, тем ниже ее шансы выйти замуж.
Факт: Недавнее исследование, основанное на анализе процента заключаемых браков среди образованных женщин в 1990-х годах, пришло к выводу, что сегодняшние женщины, выпускницы ВУЗов, имеют больше шансов выйти замуж по сравнению с их необразованными «коллегами», причем независимо от возраста, в котором создается первый брак. Этот миф является пережитком прошлого, когда женщины с высоким уровнем образования действительно реже вступали в брак.
8. Романтика и крепость чувств
Миф: Ключ к долгому и счастливому браку — это романтическая любовь.
Факт: Одна из наиболее распространенных причин долговечности брака — это заинтересованность друг в друге, партнерство и дружеское общение, а не удача и любовь. Такие пары говорят о своем браке как о творении, которое подразумевает тяжелый труд, самоотверженность и преданность делу (друг другу и институту брака). Счастливые пары являются также друзьями друг другу, которые разделяют жизнь и обладают одинаковыми интересами и ценностями.
9. Брак укрепляется с рождением детей
Миф: Наличие детей обычно сближает супругов и повышает уровень семейного счастья.
Факт: Многие исследования показали, что появление в семье первого ребенка часто приводит к тому, что муж и жена отдаляются друг от друга, это большой стресс для брака. Тем не менее, количество разводов бездетных пар превышает количество разводов пар с детьми.
10. Выгода от брака
Миф: От брака больше выгоды получают мужчины, а не женщины.
Факт: В отличие от результатов более ранних исследований, недавние эксперименты показали, что женщины и мужчины получают примерно одинаковую выгоду от брака, хоть она и проявляется по-разному. И мужчины, и женщины, живут дольше, счастливее, здоровее и богаче, когда они находятся в браке. Мужья, как правило, получают больше пользы для здоровья, а жены получают больше финансовых преимуществ.
TRANSLATION
1. Happiness - at marriage
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Because of the high divorce rate, which end in unhappy marriages, people who stay married are happier than people of previous generations, who were married and lived with a man, regardless of how well a marriage.
Fact: According to data obtained as a result of several large studies, the overall level of happiness of people who are not married has increased, and probably slightly decreased. Some studies have found that marriages in the 21st century, compared with those that consist of 20 or 30 years ago, characterized by the presence of a large work-related stress, more marital conflict and less family contact and interaction.2. Standard cohabitation
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Cohabitation - it's the same marriage, but without a stamp in your passport.
Fact: Cohabitation, as a rule, does not bring the same benefits (physical health, emotional and financial well-being) that marriage. From the point of view of these benefits, cohabitants are more like single than married couples. This is due in particular to the fact that cohabitants are not so "perfect" as married couples, they are more focused on their personal autonomy and to a lesser extent on the welfare of his partner.3. Sexual Life
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Married people are less satisfied with sexual life, and less sex than single people.
Fact: According to numerous large-scale studies, married people are much more likely to have sex, and they are getting from him more satisfaction than singles. Not only did they have sex more often, they get him more pleasure, both physical and emotional.4. Family violence
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Marriage puts women at higher risk for violent encounter.
Fact: Many studies show that, conversely, being unmarried and living with a man outside of marriage, a woman puts a face a higher risk of violence. One of the reasons for these findings may be that married women may choose to hide the facts of domestic violence. In addition, women are less likely to marry and divorce more often with those who are inclined to violence. But also true is the fact that married men are less likely to commit domestic violence because they are more invested in the welfare of their wives, and thus their families. These social factors seem to help, and aggressive behavior of men do not move the scope permitted.5. Life
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: People today do not have to expect that marriage will last a lifetime, as it did in the past, because life expectancy is now much higher.
Fact: If the comparison referred to in the myth goes back to the events of a century ago, then there is no reason to believe in this myth. Increased life expectancy due to the sharp reduction in infant mortality. And while, as a grown man now lives a little longer than his grandmother and grandfather, he is here, and get married later in life. Therefore, the typical duration of marriage, no divorce has not changed much over the past 50 years. In addition, many couples get divorced long before their marriage banging a solid round number: half of all divorces occur in the 7 year marriage.6. Life together before marriage
Myths and Facts about Marriage
MYTH: Couples who live on less before marriage, are able to test how well they fit together, such marriages are more durable, and partners get more satisfaction from them.
Fact: Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage have lower levels of marital satisfaction, and chances are that eventually life will end in divorce this pair is much higher. One reason is that cohabitants more afraid of commitment and that they often go away when there are any problems. In addition, the mere fact of living together may lead to the development of this relationship, which "complicate" the possibility of a happy marriage. A recent study showed, for example, that the housemates less motivation to resolve conflicts and maintain the existing proximity. One important exception: cohabiting couples who are planning to get married in the near future, have the same chances of success of marriage, as well as those who did not live together before marriage.7. Educated woman is more difficult to get married
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: The more educated a woman is, the lower her chances of getting married.
Fact: A recent study based on analysis of the percentage of marriages among educated women in the 1990s, came to the conclusion that today's women graduates of higher education are more likely to marry than their uneducated "colleagues", regardless of age, that created the first marriage. This myth is a relic of the past, when women with high levels of education do less married.8. Romance and strength of feelings
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: The key to a long and happy marriage - it is romantic love.
Fact: One of the most common causes of longevity of marriage - is interested in each other, partnerships, and companionship, rather than luck and love. Such couples talk about their marriage as a creation, which means hard work, dedication and commitment (to each other and the institution of marriage). Happy couples are each other as friends who share a life and have the same interests and values.9. Marriage is strengthened with the birth of children
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Having children typically brings couples and increases marital happiness.
Fact: Many studies have shown that the appearance of their first child in the family often leads to a husband and wife drifting apart, a lot of stress to a marriage. However, the number of childless couples divorce more than the number of divorces of couples with children.10. Benefits of marriage
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: From marriage are more benefits to men, not women.
Fact: In contrast to the results of earlier studies, recent experiments have shown that women and men are roughly the same benefits of marriage, although it manifests itself in different ways. Both men and women live longer, happier, healthier and richer when they are married. Husbands tend to get more health benefits, and their wives receive more financial benefits.
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Because of the high divorce rate, which end in unhappy marriages, people who stay married are happier than people of previous generations, who were married and lived with a man, regardless of how well a marriage.
Fact: According to data obtained as a result of several large studies, the overall level of happiness of people who are not married has increased, and probably slightly decreased. Some studies have found that marriages in the 21st century, compared with those that consist of 20 or 30 years ago, characterized by the presence of a large work-related stress, more marital conflict and less family contact and interaction.2. Standard cohabitation
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Cohabitation - it's the same marriage, but without a stamp in your passport.
Fact: Cohabitation, as a rule, does not bring the same benefits (physical health, emotional and financial well-being) that marriage. From the point of view of these benefits, cohabitants are more like single than married couples. This is due in particular to the fact that cohabitants are not so "perfect" as married couples, they are more focused on their personal autonomy and to a lesser extent on the welfare of his partner.3. Sexual Life
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Married people are less satisfied with sexual life, and less sex than single people.
Fact: According to numerous large-scale studies, married people are much more likely to have sex, and they are getting from him more satisfaction than singles. Not only did they have sex more often, they get him more pleasure, both physical and emotional.4. Family violence
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Marriage puts women at higher risk for violent encounter.
Fact: Many studies show that, conversely, being unmarried and living with a man outside of marriage, a woman puts a face a higher risk of violence. One of the reasons for these findings may be that married women may choose to hide the facts of domestic violence. In addition, women are less likely to marry and divorce more often with those who are inclined to violence. But also true is the fact that married men are less likely to commit domestic violence because they are more invested in the welfare of their wives, and thus their families. These social factors seem to help, and aggressive behavior of men do not move the scope permitted.5. Life
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: People today do not have to expect that marriage will last a lifetime, as it did in the past, because life expectancy is now much higher.
Fact: If the comparison referred to in the myth goes back to the events of a century ago, then there is no reason to believe in this myth. Increased life expectancy due to the sharp reduction in infant mortality. And while, as a grown man now lives a little longer than his grandmother and grandfather, he is here, and get married later in life. Therefore, the typical duration of marriage, no divorce has not changed much over the past 50 years. In addition, many couples get divorced long before their marriage banging a solid round number: half of all divorces occur in the 7 year marriage.6. Life together before marriage
Myths and Facts about Marriage
MYTH: Couples who live on less before marriage, are able to test how well they fit together, such marriages are more durable, and partners get more satisfaction from them.
Fact: Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage have lower levels of marital satisfaction, and chances are that eventually life will end in divorce this pair is much higher. One reason is that cohabitants more afraid of commitment and that they often go away when there are any problems. In addition, the mere fact of living together may lead to the development of this relationship, which "complicate" the possibility of a happy marriage. A recent study showed, for example, that the housemates less motivation to resolve conflicts and maintain the existing proximity. One important exception: cohabiting couples who are planning to get married in the near future, have the same chances of success of marriage, as well as those who did not live together before marriage.7. Educated woman is more difficult to get married
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: The more educated a woman is, the lower her chances of getting married.
Fact: A recent study based on analysis of the percentage of marriages among educated women in the 1990s, came to the conclusion that today's women graduates of higher education are more likely to marry than their uneducated "colleagues", regardless of age, that created the first marriage. This myth is a relic of the past, when women with high levels of education do less married.8. Romance and strength of feelings
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: The key to a long and happy marriage - it is romantic love.
Fact: One of the most common causes of longevity of marriage - is interested in each other, partnerships, and companionship, rather than luck and love. Such couples talk about their marriage as a creation, which means hard work, dedication and commitment (to each other and the institution of marriage). Happy couples are each other as friends who share a life and have the same interests and values.9. Marriage is strengthened with the birth of children
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: Having children typically brings couples and increases marital happiness.
Fact: Many studies have shown that the appearance of their first child in the family often leads to a husband and wife drifting apart, a lot of stress to a marriage. However, the number of childless couples divorce more than the number of divorces of couples with children.10. Benefits of marriage
Myths and Facts about Marriage
Myth: From marriage are more benefits to men, not women.
Fact: In contrast to the results of earlier studies, recent experiments have shown that women and men are roughly the same benefits of marriage, although it manifests itself in different ways. Both men and women live longer, happier, healthier and richer when they are married. Husbands tend to get more health benefits, and their wives receive more financial benefits.
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